Ada Day | Granny Tips
Recently my grand-daughter Ada and I set aside a day to hang out, eat some great food, and dream big. We delighted in some serious life visioning and shared our respective notebooks filled with aspirations and things that beckon our spirits.
Enough time has passed that I am now immersed in the challenges of being a Granny to adults (I have two grandchildren who can vote).
As children age, it seems their problems get increasingly complex. As they enter adulthood, while they are learning to master themselves, they are also trying to find their soul mate, their purpose, and their place in the world. Clearly, they have LOTS to talk about.
I don’t presume to know what anyone should do or be. In fact, I’m not always confident I can answer that for myself at almost 70!
But I am confident that I have oodles of advice, experience, and resources on how to figure it out for yourself. I know what we need to cultivate good character and to create happiness.
Getting to share all this goodness effectively is the hard part for me. That’s the sandbox I play in these day with my older grandkids. After varying experiments, I have found nothing seems to work better than a discussion over a meal with some heartfelt sharing. Here are some tips:
Let them set the date. Timing is everything and it seems kids at this age appreciate doing things on their own terms. I extend a lunch or dinner invitation and they set the day, time, place.
Let them set the agenda. We talk about whatever they want to talk about. I ask if there is anything specific or if I can help them with anything. If they share a topic, I bone up and come loaded with pockets full of ideas, and often some reading hand-outs.
Let them veer from the agenda. This is their time and they get to take it wherever they decide. I am here to ride along, not to steer.
Listen. I truly believe nothing I could possibly say is as meaningful as actively listening. It is pure love to give our non-judgmental interest, attention, and acceptance. If they leave with nothing else but knowing their granny loves them, it’s enough.
Give. Even though that “knowing their granny loves them” part is true, I love little mementos. I have a big plastic tub of give-aways which is home to all sorts of gift possibilities (aka cool stuff and meaningful junk). I have found if I add a special note or poem, anything can be transformed into a special memory of our relationship.
I love my sweet Ada. At our lunch, she inherited a special sweater. As is my practice, the sweater came with a poem from her granny. It’s called “Thank You Sheep.”
My husband Keith had purchased this sweater for me as a gift almost twenty years prior. It was waaaay too small. I never was able to get tiny enough to wear it. Now it has found a new loving home with Ada.
NEXT STEP: Grab a box and start filling it with your soon-to-be treasures for your grandkids.