UGLY BUGLY’S SECRET DIARY
Ugly Bugly has a long history with our family. She has tormented me for two decades with threats, poison, spells, and various murder attempts. She says she loves my husband and wants to marry him, but we suspect she is really looking for ownership of his black 55 Chevy, which would make a very snappy witch-mobile. Ugly Bugly has declared she wants to be the Granny of my little ones. She is convinced she would do a much better job. I live in mortal danger and have befallen many injuries, but still survive for the time being. Unbeknownst to Ugly Bugly, one of her relatives has provided a copy of this secret diary so we can keep track of her plotting and thwart her wicked plans.
• Read it at your own peril •
Although the Secrets section of the website is highly protected by Bruce, many people ignore his scary banana and read Ugly Bugly’s intimate keepsakes and poetry all the time without her permission. Despite her protests, she is secretly flattered. So go ahead if you dare. She is a moody witch and it could go badly for you. There. Warned.
Although the Secrets section of the website is highly protected by Bruce, many people ignore his scary banana and read Ugly Bugly’s intimate keepsakes and poetry all the time without her permission. Despite her protests, she is secretly flattered. So go ahead if you dare. She is a moody witch and it could go badly for you. There. Warned.
Although the Secrets section of the website is highly protected by Bruce, many people ignore his scary banana and read Ugly Bugly’s intimate keepsakes and poetry all the time without her permission. Despite her protests, she is secretly flattered. So go ahead if you dare. She is a moody witch and it could go badly for you. There. Warned.
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
So often people will ask me how I always look more beautiful than anyone they have ever seen. They also wonder how my house can always look so stunning. They can’t believe a witch like me is so generous with her style tips. I tell them everyone wants to copy me, so it is hopeless to keep these things a secret. I am also cultivating this macabre sense of style in children whenever I get the chance. They are all so homely. They need help. I am wonderful. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts.
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts.
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts.
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts.
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts.
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts. - Ugly Bugly the Witch
With sincere concern for the future of these kids, I am exerting my wonderfully negative influence to the best of my ability. Without my intervention, they would likely have friends bothering them, be happily married to an idiot, and never learn any evil magic tricks. What a waste. I can’t stand by and watch Stupid Granny ruin them with her sickening, sweet, stupidity. My stream of bad advice might be the only thing that helps plunge them into darkness. I swore an oath to do my worst by them and this is a collection of my efforts.